There are so many things I would like to share with you all the horror of a domed prison called a 'shopping mall'. First of all, women are like huge-snouted animals. They can sniff out a store with 3 cardboards of 50% OFF THE ENTIRE STORE. And that's when the guerrilla war begins. There are clothes strewn on the floor like some sort of unwanted piece of clothing with an improper amount of price. Women are digging through racks and racks and throwing useless ones, making a pile for OTHER women to sniff around and scour through.

Disgusting.

And on the men's area, things are looking abso-fabu-lutely clean.

Anyway, I was supposed to watch 2012 today but it was sold out the entire fucking day so my sister and I ended up watching Paranormal Activity.

Which was great, actually. It was great because there were two sides in the story; the believer that thinks 'this shit' is awesome, and the believer that is scared to tamper with the paranormal.

What I also like about it is that it's about demons. And I love demons.

A couple of people complained but they were just biased and pretty blind to their own self-explanation.

When it was time to go home, my sister refused to walk home from the train station and begged her friend to drive her from there to a couple of blocks to her apartment :P

@ mall
- 2 weeks ago -
Sis: I need to buy a scarf.
Me: then buy one.
- present time -
Sis: I need to buy a scarf.
Me: What the fuck you still haven't bought it yet? Next tim eI see you you BETTER HAVE BOUGHT ONE OR ELSE we're going to go through the SAME damn stores we just went today and last week in search for you damn scarf.
- a few hours later -
Me: I want an earmuff
Sis: okay
- a few hours later -
Me: is there no fucking store that sells earmuff? It's goddamn winter and they should know that. This mall breaks my heart -tears-
Sis: ...
- @ an underwear shop -
Sis: *looks at see-through spaghetti strap lingerie* I should get this
Me: why? Hasn't your boyfriend seen enough? *roll eyes*

@ work
Manager: I just need you to this and this and this
Me: Alright
Manager: I think Lucas is free, too
Me: You mean Slave #6?
Manager: Yes, Slave #6
Me: Gotcha ;)
Manager: So Lucas can help you with the table.
Me: You mean Slave #6
Manager: ...
Me: I don't name objects I intend to destroy later.
Manager: Ah, I see.

@ bus
Me: I think I'm gonna just find a slave at work instead
Lorra: like who?
Me: Alex
Lorra: Alex?
Me: Yeah. He looks easy to manipulate.

@ the overnight

Me: *starts scanning Hannah's butt* I'm scannin' your ass!
Hannah: *shows butt*
Me: *keeps scanning, stops, and starts imitating robot noise* ERROR ERROR. FILE TOO BIG. SYSTEM MALFUNCTIONING.
Hannah: *gasps* LOVELY!
Lucas: that is by far the best phrase I've ever heard this overnight.

I saw Zombieland and Where the Wild Things are a few days ago on the same night. I saw Zombieland with my gay friend and mommy-friend and, HOLYSHIT, did they talk and laugh really loud most of the time. Zombieland was great.

Then I decided to watch Where the Wild Things Are by myself because I refuse to sit next to talking people. It's not an adult film nor a kid's film. It's based more on the novelized version of the childrens book ("The Wild Things" by David Eggers). Don't watch it with a child's POV or expect a lot of funny things. It's deliciously depressing :D

I'm also preparing for a 2-weeks overnight this November and I think I love the idea. Because I don't have to deal with anybody when I work from 9:30pm to 6am for 14 days straight.

I get paid today and I hardly ate anything for 7 days but a few instant noodles and popcorn. The first thing I'm going to buy is Burger King.

My only regret tomorrow Halloween is not being able to dress up as a she-Joker or a capitalist.

@ work
Me: Oh god, a stack of really thick hardcover 'home renovation' books just fell on my big toe and it took all I had not to scream really hard D:
Co-worker: oh geez, that's terrible!
Manager: shall I call the medic for you, or write you up for a health form?
Co-worker: yeah, you should really do that
Me: mental health, as well?
Co-worker: yes
Me: like call one of those 1-800 help lines?
Manager: we do have that sheet tacked up on the board
Co-worker: you can if you want...
Me: they told me to stop calling them. *mimics* "please, sir, I have a problem!!" -- "stop calling us!" -- "but my issues are real and serious!"
Co-worker: ....O___O...
Manager: ...I don't even have a response for that *walks away*

@ the receiving back
Me: guess what I'm going to be for Halloween
Co-worker: what?
Me: I'm going to dress up as Dora the Explorer, stand in the Kids Section and say "come here, children, I have free candies in my pants for you to get" in broken English
Co-worker: oh god xD
Me: "are you alone, little boy? Come reach into my pants to find a companion~"
Co-worker: I don't think we're allowed to dress up as Child Molesters in this store, otherwise you'd have to talk to the managers
Me: I'm serious! I could do it. (thinks: my life is SO boring I need to be alleged for something)

@ work
Me: do you have a purple dress?!
Co-worker #1: what do you need it for?
Me: I need it to dress up as a she-Joker so I can touch myself all over
Co-worker #2: -walks in- ...what??
Co-worker #3: y'see with Lovely, you can really walk in to a whole perverted conversation.

@ work
Me: how much would it cost if I build my own computer?
Manager: it depends.
Me: on?
Manager: what kind of computer you want.
Me: I want a gaming PC.
Manager: that depends as well.
Me: will it have enough Gigs to put porn too?
Manager: ...
Me: I need my gigs for gaming and porn...
Manager: ...
Me: I know! I can use my old PC for porn and the new one for gaming!
Manager: ...yeah.

-five minutes of talking and persuading-

Manager: yes, Lovely, you will have enough space for your gaming AND your porn.

I am going to shamelessly confess that there is/are one, two, three, or more things I hate in and about everybody I know or met. There has not been a soul I know that exempt that trait I carry with me at all times and, frankly, I'm fucking relieve about it.

And what the fuck is the deal with people depressing over what I do? I have every right to feel this way and if I prefer to keep it to myself does not mean anyone has the right to get it out of me just because they're worried. I'm sick of people asking others what's wrong because 'they look sad'. IF I DON'T COMPLAIN ABOUT MY PROBLEMS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE DOES THEN THAT MEANS I HAVE NO FUCKING PROBLEM KEEPING IT INSIDE. FUCK.

...

Those who have been mutual LJ-friends with me and my older account for more than a year should know that November is coming for me in a couple of weeks and I'm going to be another ball of scared animal running away from my problem.

I've subconsciously started fading mentally all over again.

I'm going to start blinking in and out after this post and any other post you see on November is purely out of trying to keep myself sane and away from the terrible scab I carry on that particular month.


Bye everyone :(

@ work
opium: *starts humming the Venga Boys song*
Me: *hums with her*
Co-worker: why are you guys humming the Vengaboys song?
Me: Because it's one of the Most Annoying Chapters Song
opium: what's the other one?--
Me: *sings Barney song* ME AND MY TEDDY GETTING ALL READY~~
opium: NOOOOOOOOOO
Me: HA!! YOU ASKED.


Everybody's first impression with me is always either disgusting, nasty, or perverted.  In the end, you all love me.  Admit it.  Where is your entertainment and laughter without me?

I give opium for showing me this book that won't come out in our store until November 3rd.


About three things I was absolutely certain. First, Edwart was most likely my soul mate, maybe. Second, there was a vampire part of him-which I assumed was wildly out of his control-that wanted me dead. And third, I unconditionally, irrevocably, impenetrably, heterogeneously, gynecologically, and disreputably wished he had kissed me.

And thus Belle Goose falls in love with the mysterious and sparkly Edwart Mullen in the Harvard Lampoon's hilarious send-up of Twilight.

Pale and klutzy, Belle arrives in Switchblade, Oregon looking for adventure, or at least an undead classmate. She soon discovers Edwart, a super-hot computer nerd with zero interest in girls. After witnessing a number of strange events-Edwart leaves his tater tots untouched at lunch! Edwart saves her from a flying snowball!-Belle has a dramatic revelation: Edwart is a vampire. But how can she convince Edwart to bite her and transform her into his eternal bride, especially when he seems to find girls so repulsive?

Complete with romance, danger, insufficient parental guardianship, creepy stalker-like behavior, and a vampire prom, Nightlight is the uproarious tale of a vampire-obsessed girl, looking for love in all the wrong places.

( Snippet of a fantastic book dedicated to a fucking horrible series )

Oh God, we allI can't WAIT.